Uncomfortable Thanksgiving: Obama, Prop 8, and My Marriage

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steve clemons and harvey milk.jpg
I got married to my partner of 17 years in San Francisco on August 18th of this year. We did so under the beautiful dome of San Francisco’s magnificent City Hall — and I had my picture taken (above) with Harvey Milk’s statue. It was a powerful package for me — paying a fee to the City for a contract that finally said that my partner and I had the rights and responsibilities of other married couples. We met others that day — gay and straight couples — who got married about the same time we did on those City Hall steps.
I don’t often delve into the deeply personal in my blogging commentary — although foreign policy, getting national security decisions right or wrong, economic frameworks that turn the wrong stakeholders into losers rather than winners are all personal matters for me. But this year the fear and bigotry that animated Proposition 8 in California has made this a strange Thanksgiving.
Yes, like everyone — I’m pleased that Barack Obama won the White House. But it is only a small beginning in the right direction. But with Barack Obama, we also got Proposition 8. We have him talking about Iraq as the “bad war” and Afghanistan as the “good war”. We have political appointments in both security and economic policy that either will be the height of brilliant personnel and policy maneuvering or alternatively could end up as a paralyzed cabinet and government disaster. There is only fog ahead, much yet we don’t know.
We have wars going on in the Middle East that shouldn’t be going on. I have friends there now being shot at — and helping to kill others — and this wasn’t what the 21st century was supposed to be about.
I have been writing here for some time — far before the National Intelligence Council’s Global Trends 2025 report came out chronicling America’s global decline — that America’s mystique as a great nation had been punctured by the invasion of Iraq. We showed key limits in our military and economic capacity, leading allies and foes respectively to count on us and fear us less. The economic crisis is the punctuation point in America’s fall from its once significant global perch. I’m worried about all of this — making a traditional thanksgiving very uncomfortable.
Our new president preaches inclusion, which is a good thing — and I think he has the potential to be one of the great stewards of the White House and the executive branch authority we have given him.
But how could people who helped deliver this man to the White House also spit on my decision to enter into marriage with someone I have been with for 17 years? Europe has embraced adjustments in marriage easily and in a socially healthy way, and yet we still stoke embers of nativism and fundamentalism in this country. Barack Obama’s voice was used on anti-gay marriage robocalls to African-American and Hispanic voters in California. To my knowledge, he didn’t ask for his voice not to be used.
I think intolerance is what undermines the glue of a nation, stirring up fear and violence at home and in wars abroad. We have a lot of intolerant Americans who helped elect George W. Bush twice to the White House, and now we have many other intolerant Americans who have come into their civic responsibilities as voters and have tainted the hope that people like my partner and I have for a better and more just nation that recognizes our relationship in the ways it should be recognized.
I’m going to see the movie Milk today starring Sean Penn reprising brilliantly the life of the assassinated first gay elected politician in the United States — and no matter what Proposition 8 thought it achieved, I’ll be wearing my ring.
So, this is an uncomfortable Thanksgiving holiday, and I hope that those who read this today do embrace their family and friends — all of them, gay ones too — and remember that this nation needs to stop dragging when it comes to bigotry.
– Steve Clemons

Comments

99 comments on “Uncomfortable Thanksgiving: Obama, Prop 8, and My Marriage

  1. J H Robbins says:

    I have a friend who once said that she could not believe that we even needed a dictum like the ERA; it made her sad and angry that we had to legislate equality (or try to). I feel this way about the struggle for equal rights for the LGBT community. I felt this way (to an extent-I was fairly young at the time) about the Civil Rights movement. For some reason, man has always needed the ‘other’ to make himself feel safe, secure and right in his own positions-and this ignominy has fallen on many, many groups in the past – Jews, Catholics, blacks, Hispanics, Poles, Italians, the Irish, etc, etc. Thus it has always been and I think it will always be; it’s just that the characters change places. I think the thing that has always surprised me the most however, is the intolerance within groups that themselves have been discriminated against and I can only explain it as I did before-most people need the ‘other’ over which to feel superior. Maybe someday in the future, man will be able to divorce himself from this hateful aspect of human nature, but until then, we will have to fight our singular fights for respect and tolerance.
    BTW, my partner and I have you beat – we have 27 years together. (insert smiley emoticon here)

    Reply

  2. Kathleen Grasso Andersen says:

    Congrats, Steve! But why not play it safe? Go to CT..gay marriafe is legal here, as of Nov.10th. I’m going back to being AWOL..can’t stamd the news…at least for now….Carroll..I dreamt we organized a big fundrasier together to find a cure for a disaease,,,somehow it was connected to Yale…maybe the disease was Pavlavitis..

    Reply

  3. zak822 says:

    Others have offered informed comment, I offer Belated congratulations from a straight couple in Wilkinsburg, Pennsylvania!

    Reply

  4. viktor vaughn says:

    Minority rights were never meant to be subjected to a majority vote. Pure and simple. That’s the beauty of the US constitution.
    Steve, I’m with you on all fronts.
    But damn, you gotta do something about the lighting on the comb-over. I think when it gets to a certain point, you just have to embrace the shaved head look.
    Best.
    V.

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  5. Damien says:

    Best wishes and congratulations on your marriage.
    We are still working towards marriage here in Australia, but it will come!
    I have been listening to your weekly conversations with Deborah Cameron on Sydney radio for probably as long as you have been having them. Always interesting and informative, and I now peruse your site fairly regularly too.
    Keep up the good work!

    Reply

  6. Linda says:

    So Cal Phil and Everyone,
    I hope everyone is aware that a nationwide economic boycott protest against Prop 8 and all similar discrimination against GLTG persons is planned for December 10 as A Day Without a Gay.
    Everyone can participate and more information is available at daywtithoutagay.org or jointheimpact.com.

    Reply

  7. So Cal Phil says:

    Publicly disclosing that you are gay is, still, a courageous act on 11/27/08. Steve has done so much more then that. He has disclosed his personal relationships, his marriage, and feelings of loss and pain with the passage prop 8 (h8). I believe that one reason prop 8 passed was that still, so many people, particularly conservative, religious people, don’t know Gay and Lesbian people. Supporting Gay and Lesbian family, friends, neighbors and co-workers to disclose to those in their lives whom they suspect will have a negative reaction is necessary for the end of prejudice against Gay and Lesbian people. I am fortunate in that I live in a liberal neighborhood, am Gay, and everyone whom I have relationship of any depth knows my family, marriage, and child; but most all of them are progressive democrats. I think we all need to follow Steve’s example and disclose who we are, and those who are not Gay and Lesbian (which is most people) need to reach out to Gay and Lesbian people who need to disclose their lives to people who are not progressive democrats. Courage is hard to summon and the care and support of friends makes an extraordinary difference. Peace to all, and Happy Holidays to Steve

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  8. David says:

    Congratulations to you on your now officially santioned marriage. Steve, we will win this one. I suspect that the anti-gay marriage amendments in California and Florida might prove a perverse blessing in disguise, as it calls the question in rather stark terms. It is my opinion at this point that the federal government will ultimately be forced to acknowledge that states have no individual right to deny an essential civil right, and I think that younger Americans are coming more and more to accept this as an essential civil/human right. For me, it mirrors the race-related civil rights movement, even if not as violent.
    I gather that under our understanding of law, your marriage is a legal contract that cannot be overturned regardless of Prop 8.
    I’ll end where I started: Congratulations to you and your spouse, and a lifetime of continued happiness in your marriage. When Obama won, one of the things I thought immediately about was your comment regarding Jill Biden in a previous post.

    Reply

  9. jbjd says:

    (I wrote this comment before seeing your picture.)
    The potential to which Mr. Clemons refers is rightly reserved for those with either a record of like performance; or no record at all. BO, on the other hand, has a record that evidences anyone who expects better than worse is a fool. I would imagine that, Steve Clemons is white and, has few if any close black friends (like, I suspect, many of BO’s most mesmerized minions) because as anyone of color knows, the black community is, in general, homophobic.

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  10. frankly0 says:

    Steve, from your comments, I assume that, before the election, you were vehemently decrying Obama’s refusal to repudiate, in a very visible public way, the use of his own words and voice by Prop 8 advocates.
    Oh, you weren’t doing that? You were instead engaged in nothing but the most uncritical of partisan hackery?
    Um, and excuse me, who lacked any form of political courage — you or Obama? I mean, it’s only your own life that was severely affected by Obama’s refusal to repudiate the use of his words, and you’re presuming to lay blame on him, when you wouldn’t say boo at the time yourself?

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  11. PissedOffAmerican says:

    Crazy times. We’ll stand idly by as our leaders loot the coffers of eight trillion dollars, but we won’t allow our neighbors to enjoy marriage.
    If we’ll trample some poor minimum wage worker to death on a Wal-Mart floor just to get at a three hundred dollar laptop, what are we capable of if we get really hungry?
    It appears we may be about to find out.

    Reply

  12. PissedOffAmerican says:

    Steve, “Cardinal Rich” was responding to my post, where I did in fact call him an asshole because of his following comment….
    “Must be hard that you can’t flagellate and pin this entirely on right-wing idiots donning bedsheets. Must be busting up your squishy leftist hearts. I for one hope that you get the equal rights you deserve – but will thoroughly enjoy you lefties go through your angst with the realization that your sainted fellow victims don’t really give three hoots about you”

    Reply

  13. leo says:

    Thank you for your great story and great blog Steve.

    Reply

  14. Doug in Oakland says:

    This is my first time reading you, but I will come back. Firstly, congratulations. Secondly, thank you for being an example; I have found that actual humans are harder to hate and fear than threatening groups of faceless “others”. And this issue is all about hate and fear. Third, I think it has a good chance of being struck down in the courts. If they can get it thrown back to the legislature it’s through. The state legislature would (I’m told) stomp it into the dirt, and the establishment clause would take it out at the federal level. That’s the way I understand it anyway, if indeed I do understand it. And support is happening from unlikely places, like our Governator, who urged gay marriage advocates to “never give up”, and likened their struggle to his own experience with lifting weights (??). That, Arnold, is called empathy, and I wasn’t aware you had any… Perhaps it’s human decency that’s catching- who knows, maybe it could be a trend.

    Reply

  15. Helena says:

    I love reading this blog, and all the interesting, incisive comments. I believe that this latest setback or prop. 8 is only a temporary blip and that surely the next few years the law of the land will show the will of the majority of the people. Onwards and upwards.
    Congratulations and gratitude is due to all your successes of the past year, your groundbreaking news and the general tone of the way you present it. Thank you so much.

    Reply

  16. Steve Clemons says:

    Cardinal Rich — I may be missing something, but I don’t think I challenged you anywhere, nor would I call you names. Perhaps I am missing your earlier post somehow or it’s not under “cardinal rich.” I agree with you that the Mormon Church did not do this alone and that there was significant help from some minority groups who came in to support Obama but who also carry a values infrastructure that is quite socially conservative.
    Thanks for your support of civil unions and marriages between same sex couples.
    In any case, I just want to make clear that I did not attack you. best regards, Steve Clemons

    Reply

  17. Cardinal Rich says:

    How ironic that you rip proponents of prop 8 of lacking intellectual heft yet you response to my post was to call me a despicable asshole. How erudite of you. First read closely – I am in favor of unions and marriages or whatever the heck can be enacted in respective states. I was just pointing out the obvious – that minority groups tend to be socially conservative in thought and downright homophobic in some ways. Polling has shown that the African-American vote helped tip the scales for the passage of Prop 8. You can screech at the Mormons all you want but they didn’t do it alone. It’s easy to pick on a church…especially the Mormons but money doesn’t win elections, people do.
    Incidentally – I do identify myself as a conservative Republican but at no point do I say that I voted for McCain/Palin. Get a life, get clue or at least get laid.

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  18. Michael says:

    Legions of people that contributed to the election of an African American to the office of the Presidency of the US did not live to see it. So it is with the inevitable victory of full civil rights for gay and lesbian couples. The benefits of marriage bestowed on most of us will inure to all couples who seek the State’s contract one day in spite of people like former Senator Rick Santini who believe if gay couples are allowed to marry dedicated hunters will soon be petitioning to marry their dogs.

    Reply

  19. MarkL says:

    Steve,
    Congratulations! All these years commenting here and I didn’t this about you—although I doubted someone as intelligent,handsome and socially aware as you would be single.
    Best wishes for this holiday and all future ones.

    Reply

  20. K Galt says:

    Congrats Steve! I know I became aware of how absurd how criminal restricting people’s access to marriage is when two friends of mine who have been together for 25 years both teachers were unable to get the sick days needed when one of them had a serious operation. Her partner was unable to take off time from work to be with her partner several hours away. We all chipped in taking care of the children etc. so that she could be with her parther during this critical time that any other couple would have had sick days for. I was apppalled.
    Congrats again

    Reply

  21. matt says:

    Happy Thanksgiving to you…from Missouri. Keep up the good fight there in CA. Equal rights for all!

    Reply

  22. T.J. Pempel says:

    Steve,
    I hadn’t realized that you and Andrew had tied the knot; my warm best wishes to you both. And realize that some of us in California will still be pushing back against Prop 8. T.J.

    Reply

  23. woody says:

    Steve, mebbe you can answer a persistent question.
    “Why don’t/haven’t proponents of gay marriage unions (include me in, but IANAL) attacked prohibitions from the position of their violating the either (or both) the 1st Amendment (Establishment clause) or the 14th Amendment (Equal Protection/Due Process clauses)?”
    It seems to me (as i asid before, IANAL) either one should do the trick, but both should be a slam-dunk.
    Nest paw?

    Reply

  24. PissedOffAmerican says:

    Its interesting when one reads the general “tone” of the posts here opposing gay marriage. Almost to no exception, they are completely devoid of intellectual argument or explanation, and are comprised of hateful and snide snickerings focused at the so called “left”.
    “Redefine marriage”, “threaten the institution of marriage”, “marriage is between a man and a woman”, etc., is about as “intellectual” as it gets from these yahoos. I have yet to hear a coherant argument about how gay marriages “threaten” heterosexual marriages.
    Its my belief that Prop 8 was passed by the timeworn practice of deceptive marketing, a huge expendure of money by rabidly RW and religious institutions such as the Mormon Church, and most importantly, the misrepresentation of Barack Obama’s “support” for prop 8.
    I also believe, to some degree it backfired on them, because many RW adherants to the insane blathering of these people like Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Inga Barks, etc went to the polls, and, unable to bring themselves to vote for McCain and his idiot running mate, voted for Obama, believing that Obama was supportive of Prop 8.
    And don’t for a moment think these homophobic jackasses are through with this issue. The RW radio talk shows in Central Cal have addressed the issue daily, even this late after the game, and are sowing their message of hate just as fervently as they did prior to the polling.
    Inga Barks, at kernradio.com is one of the more prolific and rabid jackasses sowing this hate filled spew. Drop her a note.
    Inga@kernradio.com

    Reply

  25. ME says:

    Happy Thanksgiving Steve! Your posting gave me pause as I took a moment to reflect on the case of Mildred and Richard Perry Loving, the Virginia couple who were the subject of Loving vs. Virginia (1967), in which the Supreme Court declared Virginia’s ban against interracial marriage unconstitutional.
    On the 40th anniversary of the case Mrs. Loving released a statement which included the following:
    „…… not a day goes by that I don’t think of Richard and our love, our right to marry, and how much it meant to me to have that freedom to marry the person precious to me, even if others thought he was the “wrong kind of person” for me to marry. I believe all Americans, no matter their race, no matter their sex, no matter their sexual orientation, should have that same freedom to marry. Government has no business imposing some people’s religious beliefs over others. Especially if it denies people’s civil rights.
    I am still not a political person, but I am proud that Richard’s and my name is on a court case that can help reinforce the love, the commitment, the fairness, and the family that so many people, black or white, young or old, gay or straight seek in life. I support the freedom to marry for all. That’s what Loving, and loving, are all about.”
    Thankfully Mrs. Loving and her husband helped pave the way for people like my husband and I (my husband is of West Indian decent). Hopefully, a reinvigorated Supreme Court in the coming years can do the same for you and your partner.
    Peace.

    Reply

  26. Karin says:

    Steve,
    I can’t even contemplate the pain of being told your marriage is suddenly, somehow, not “real”. It’s not only wrong, it’s cruel.
    But if it is any consolation to you at all, here’s my view on it – you are married. You will always be married. It’s not something the state can take away from you, only something they can grant. So you and your husband are married and will stay so. That can’t change. On the other hand, the folks who out of prejudice or thoughtlessness or irrational fear seek to cancel out you relationship – they CAN change. Here’s hoping they will
    All the best,
    Karin

    Reply

  27. Chari Daignault says:

    Steve,
    Congratulations on your marriage. It warms my heart.
    Thanks for always being a steady, strong voice on all things political. It’s nice to also hear the same in something so personal. I tend to yell and scream a lot with regard to mine. :)
    My partner and I have been together for over 10 years and look forward to the day when we and you can enjoy the same civil rights as everyone else.

    Reply

  28. bob h says:

    Best wishes to you both. The only thing that matters here is the strength of the human connection, and how one achieves that is no one else’s business.

    Reply

  29. Hopper says:

    Steve:
    Long time reader, first time poster:
    Hat’s off on your marriage.
    You provide a vital, nuanced and well reasoned voice in your area
    of expertise.
    The tide of history, which is to say the future, in regard to Prop 8
    is on your side.
    Period.
    Regards to your family….
    ( I love your dogs )

    Reply

  30. Archie Chustas says:

    Come to Canada — we have full marriage rights here…and have had for a number of years. It hasn’t resulted in the “dreaded disasters” foretold by our opponents; but, on the other hand we have not had much impact on the rising divorce rates among heterosexual couples nor on growing family problems. Oh well, obviously we have new challenges which are nicely “normal” and not the major flash points of the past.

    Reply

  31. Alex says:

    Hey, Bedrock, face this tough fact: when republicans support this administration then they join the ranks of the enemies of the constitution and, richly with irony, enemies of the constitution ARE “enemies of the nation.” Perhaps you could spare a glance at the presidential oath of office; it’s in the constitution. And they have amply demonstrated that the concept of equality is a complete mystery to them.
    There is nobody on the planet who reeks of intolerance more than somebody who thinks the media is liberal. Conservatives constantly whine about those meanies in the media. Poor babies.

    Reply

  32. Bedrock Guy says:

    Steve,
    Oh, you had a bad Thanksgiving. Tough. Your side of the aisle reeks with intolerance – your media buddies just ignore it and focus on your enemies. Intolerance – you’ve talked about Republicans like they were the enemies of the nation the last 8 years. Your whining today is rich with irony.
    Your side has much to learn about the reality of intolerance. The entire Prop 8 episode has been quite a shock for you, hasn’t it? Learned anything yet about the intolerance of your Dem “allies”? r/ Bedrock Guy

    Reply

  33. Mr.Murder says:

    Keep in mind the Constitution affords rights “to all persons” so taxpaying is not a sole qualifier.
    It simply justifies the sense of standing.
    Taxation without representation was abhorrent to the founders.

    Reply

  34. Mr.Murder says:

    If you live in DC proper, challenge paying tax if they forbid your partnership choice.
    14th Amendment item.
    Cut and dried.
    Equal Protection.
    You contribution to society as a taxpayer cements your standing in the case.

    Reply

  35. Carroll says:

    Posted by PissedOffAmerican Nov 27, 6:30PM
    >>>>>>>>>>>
    I read the link. Pissant little midget nazis doing a slo mo genocide of the Palestines.
    I think we can judge Obama right out of the gate by what he does about Isr-Pal. I don’t expect much from him unless someone rakes his conscience over the coals on this issue…but maybe we will be surprised…I doubt it, but maybe.
    I just read Clayton’s Swisher book “The Truth about Camp David”. If there was a Nobel for lying it would been awarded to the zionist and Israelis for the past 60 years and probably in perpetuity.

    Reply

  36. Jill says:

    Congratulations on your marriage! Wishing you both many many happy years together…

    Reply

  37. Carroll says:

    Congratulations Steve! And to your life mate!
    And good to see your true soul showing thru in this post.

    Reply

  38. bangzoom14 says:

    I read the Global Research link provided by POA. Holy cow.. pretty explosive stuff. This is Israel’s idea of being committed to peace?? I guess the answer is yes in bushworld.

    Reply

  39. henry says:

    RN writes: “Millions of people like me elected Barack Obama because we believe in social justice … That doesn’t mean we believe in redefining marriage. Why is that so hard to understand?”
    Because recognizing marriage equality IS a matter of social justice, RN. Denying marriage, a fundamental right to an entire class of people is cruel and damaging. What part of “Equal Protection Under Law” is so hard for you to understand? HENRY.

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  40. RN says:

    “How could people who helped deliver this man to the White House also spit on my decision to enter into marriage with someone I have been with for 17 years?”
    This is evidence of the cultural alienation of the far left… the total failure to comprehend that not everyone left of the political center is necessarily a social progressive. Millions of people like me elected Barack Obama because we believe in social justice and international reconciliation. That doesn’t mean we believe in redefining marriage. Why is that so hard to understand?

    Reply

  41. Mavis says:

    Steve,
    I have so much I want to say, but I have eaten far too much turkey.
    I agree with serge, I think the LDS tax exempt status should be taken away.
    I believe everything we do either comes from fear or love. I just don’t see how anyone could be fearful of two people loving each other. It amazes me how far people will go to perpetuate fear.
    17 years! Thanks for the great life example you, your husband and dogs are showing the universe!

    Reply

  42. David Schrock-Shenk says:

    Steve:
    Through the years of reading your post, it seemed that you were giving us hints that you were gay. As i would read them, I wondered when you would more openly claim that status, always knowing that it was your decision about the timing. It was wonderful reading your post about your marriage and your relationship.
    I am a straight man, married for 25 years to a wonderful woman. I rejoice when anyone else – of any possible orientation – makes a commitment of love to another human being.
    May you and your partner continue to enjoy your love for each other. Thanks for sharing with us so openly.
    Yours in peace,
    David

    Reply

  43. henry says:

    STEVE, I know that you have many friends here who fully respect your marriage, and please count me as one of them. I believe that California’s Supreme Court will invalidate Proposition 8 in 2009. But if not, then we will put another Proposition on the ballot in 2009, and another in 2010, and another in 2011, until we win, until we can marry the person we love, until we are full citizens equally protected by our laws. HENRY (henry5h5@aol.com).

    Reply

  44. AndrewMehdizadeh says:

    Let’s first note the discriminatory languange Prop. 8 accompanying Prop. 8 when it appeared on the California ballot: “ELIMINATES RIGHT of same-sex couples to marry.” That’s right – it “eliminated” a “right.” I think it is absolutely disgraceful that anyone even mildly concerned about human and civil rights would vote for such a bigoted measure.
    To those liberals who argue that gay marriage isn’t important because it is simply a “new idea” and not a civil rights issue, I ask them whether or not desegregation was a “new idea” in the early 1960s. The truth is that progressivism, as a principle, is all about introducing “new ideas” to our government and society. Gay marriage is not a new idea – it is a natural extension of our modern society and the guiding principles of our Constitution.
    Steve is right when he pointed out that the same kind of fear that led voters to oppose gay marriage is the same kind of fear that led so many Americans to support the invasion of Iraq and the suspension of many civil liberties after the September 11 attacks. Fear is a dangerous force in our society and I hope that President Obama will not be a “Pander Bear” when it comes to this issue.
    Though I have little hope in the Democrats and their “Sister Soulijah” mentality (see Glenn Greenwald), I am optimistic that a day will come when those who are disappointed with the actions of their party will send a clear message that their votes will no longer be taken for granted and that triangulation is the death of the liberal agenda. Realists will recognize that the ballot box failed to bring policy victories and that there is more to elections than celebrity candidates and plumbers.
    This celebrity driven campaign victory will prove to be a disaster for the progressive agenda, but eventually the kaleidoscope will be shaken and the pieces will be thrown into flux. After all, the glue that held these parts together could not possibly have stayed in place forever. The pieces will settle again and when they do, the political landscape will have changed completely – a new dynamic will have emerged and there will be a vastly different world.

    Reply

  45. PissedOffAmerican says:

    Gads, two despicable assholes in a row.
    Reading their posts, its not hard to understand why McCain and Palin got flushed down the crapper by the vast majority of American voters.

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  46. kotzabasis says:

    Congratulations Steve for your wedlock to your 17 year long partner. But abstracting from social niceties I must say to you that it will take many years, maybe 17, before you ‘divorce’ yourself from your trite political analysis and flippant idealism.

    Reply

  47. theCardinal says:

    I don’t mean to belittle your misfortune but it is truly ironic. I am a conservative Republican of Hispanic descent who lives in Florida. I voted against our version of prop 8 (Amendment 2) which much to my surprise exceeded the 60% threshold. It amazes me that the very people who flocked to Obama helped both Prop 8 and Amend 2 pass. Must kill you guys…always trotting out the civil rights struggle and how we’re all in this together and get totally screwed by minority voters with provincial attitudes. Must be hard that you can’t flagellate and pin this entirely on right-wing idiots donning bedsheets. Must be busting up your squishy leftist hearts. I for one hope that you get the equal rights you deserve – but will thoroughly enjoy you lefties go through your angst with the realization that your sainted fellow victims don’t really give three hoots about you.

    Reply

  48. katjam says:

    My husband and I have recently attended two church weddings
    here in MA, one for a gay couple and one lesbian. Wonder of
    wonders our own marriage of 35 years is still intact having been
    in attendance. Even more remarkable, the state we live in, the
    one that allows such dangerous legal unions, has the lowest
    divorce rate in the country. (Bible Belt states have the highest.)
    I am as appalled Prop 8 passed as I am joyous Barack Obama
    was elected. His election gives me hope the rest of Amerca will
    soon be making their own next step towards your civil rights just
    as we have already done in Massachusetts.
    Your blog is one of my daily reads, Steve. Thank you for taking
    time to write daily and even answer emails! All the best to you
    and your partner and I hope 8 is either overridden by the courts
    or the voters next time.

    Reply

  49. Esther says:

    Hey Steve, this is my first time reading your blog. I followed the link from Andrew Sullivan. I just wanted to congratulate you on your marriage and wish you and your husband all the best. The passage of Prop. 8 made Election Day a very bittersweet one for me. I firmly believe that equal means equal and we shouldn’t have two classes of American citizens. My gay and lesbian friends are entitled the exact same rights that I enjoy. It enrages me that this whole debate was framed as a “threat” to families. My friends don’t threaten anyone. Their ability to marry would only strengthen society. I live near Massachusetts, where nothing has changed since same-sex marriage became legal – except that our gay and lesbian friends and neighbors and coworkers and loved ones are now better protected and more secure. This is a civil rights struggle, pure and simple.

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  50. Chicagoan says:

    Congratulations, Steve! And don’t be blind to the progress that’s been made. My four year old literally doesn’t know that marriage is anything other than something that can be between any two people. The millions of kids like him who are being raised to take marriage equality as a given are the surest guarantor that this wrong will eventually be fully righted.

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  51. ed says:

    Well let’s get Obama to repeal DADT. Or at least try. Hell, it’s a winner for Obama if he does it early enough. Now hop to it! First thing tomorrow.

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  52. DonS says:

    POA, my partner/wife marvels at the “negativity” of the Global Research postings, albeit they provide an orientation virtually missing from the USA press/sites pablum. And GlobalResearch is located only across the river, in Canada. I must say, they provide a sobering look.
    As far as Israeli good deeds towards the Palestinians, lets just say it falls into the realm of fairy tale.

    Reply

  53. Bob McWilliams says:

    Steve, this is a great picture and a great column. I am confident that in some years, sooner rather than later, as a society, we’ll look back on Prop 8 as we know look back on misceganation laws–with a mixture of disbelief and horror.
    I hope you had a wonderful thanksgiving. I had no family around this year, and was invited to a wonderful family celebration. One straight couple, two lesbian couples, one with two gorgeous adopted girls from Guatamala, one gay male couple, one single gay male and me. It was as traditional and family oriented and middle America, middle class as any holiday dinner I have ever attended. I wish that more of the prop 8 proponents attended holiday dinners like that, maybe some would change their minds. The families I was with today were no less valid, no less loving and no less wonderful than tha Obamas who are moving into the White House.
    I’ve been such a huge admirer of your deeply thought out writings on national security, without knowing anything about your life in other contexts. I thank you for sharing this with your readers today.
    Bob McWilliams
    Lawrence, KS

    Reply

  54. erict says:

    Congrats and godspeed to you both.
    Take heart. Prop 8 will prove to be a small battle loss in the longer struggle. It will in fact serve as a rally call to all, gay and straight who care about civil liberties.

    Reply

  55. Beth in VA says:

    Congratulations, Steve!
    I agree that this Thanksgiving is uncomfortable in many ways. Overseas and at home the economy is scary. The bombings in India, Iraq, the killing in Afghanistan–all horrible.
    I’m so hopeful for the Obama administration, but sad about Prop 8 in California. Your news adds more weight that’s causing a rising tide of acceptance, compassion and understanding. Thanks for all your work, thanks to your partner for his support of you in your work, and best wishes for a wonderful, loving life together!

    Reply

  56. PissedOffAmerican says:

    For those of you that took the time to read the “food for thought” link I provided, (above), I urge you to reflect on this heading and paragraph, gleaned from the AIPAC website….
    “Israel’s Quest for Peace”
    “As Israel undergoes a political transition, it still remains committed to peace and continues to take numerous steps to encourage peace negotiations with its neighbors and to facilitate humanitarian assistance to the Palestinians”

    Reply

  57. mortgage says:

    Happy thanksgiving everyone!

    Reply

  58. MobiusKlein says:

    The robo calls were not aimed at any racial group – I got one, and I’m honky through and through.
    To me, it was obviously quotes taken out of context, sent out at 8:00 pm election eve. At that point, it was far to late for any big pushback. (I did get the counter-robo call before the inciting robocall, oddly tho.
    It takes time, time, time sadly. Growing up for me, racism was far far away, but homophobia was very strong. And it’s better now, and so am I.

    Reply

  59. BarbaraF says:

    First, let me congratulate you and your partner on your recent marriage.
    I read you regularly, but this is my first comment. I know how difficult a period it is, finally being able to marry and then having that despicable proposition passed, which must seem like a terrible slap in the face.
    Believe me though, gays are so much closer than you think to full equality, not just under the law but also in society. It is only the margins of society that would now be considered homophobic, and the vote on that proposition was more a matter of lack of education (not to mention the vast amount of money spent by the Mormons and Catholics) than anything else. I read Andrew Sullivan, and it appears that the human rights group needs to make some changes in how they address this issue so that people understand better.
    I know that is of little comfort to you right now, because you deserve better, but those of us who support you will continue to push this issue in every way possible.
    And together, we will win it. I hope you enjoyed your turkey, and pass the stuffing, please!

    Reply

  60. Craig says:

    Congratulations Steve! And Happy Thanksgiving!
    My wife and I gladly voted no on Prop 8. The Obama campaign recommended No on prop. 8 but the yes people used his name repeatedly to confuse people. In the last three days of the campaign, I received four robocalls using Obama’s name. Over the summer, the polls showed Prop. 8 being rejected.
    I have yet to see a comprehensive news story on exactly what happened. But I’ve seen lots of rumors. I have no doubt, however, that every right-wing politician is seeking out the advice of the people who ran the yes on 8 campaign. Progressives of all stripes need to pay attention to this.

    Reply

  61. PissedOffAmerican says:

    After you’ve filled up on turkey or ham, here’s some food for thought….
    http://globalresearch.ca/index.php?context=va&aid=11171

    Reply

  62. Kirk says:

    Steve:
    Congratulations on your wedding. You and your partner should enjoy the legal recognition of your relationship; hopefully, the law will catch up with this simple need for equality.
    I must, however, tell you that I feel very cheated by life. There was very little that made middle age attractive to me except for one thing. I knew that when I got there that I would understand why people got upset about by other people’s sexual orientation, hair length, body art, etc.
    I must admit that I am now at that age and still fail to comprehend.
    Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving!

    Reply

  63. Ben Rosengart says:

    And I almost forgot — congratulations on your marriage!
    Seventeen years, wow …

    Reply

  64. Ben Rosengart says:

    When you posted about your trip to SF, Steve, I guessed what it
    was for. I’m glad you’ve decided to go public about it. Progress
    is made of, among other things, such personal steps of courage.
    I was married two days before you, in the state of
    Massachusetts. Not a gay wedding — but we chose to do it in
    MA to make a statement about that. I will think of your
    anniversary when we celebrate our own.
    You ask how Obama voters in CA could spit on your decision.
    To a great extent, I believe they were misled. The Yes on 8
    campaign pressed some very hot buttons with their lies, and
    they were very effective in getting their message out, helped by
    buckets of out-of-state money.
    I don’t know that I’ve ever heard you sound so bleak in your
    assessments. These are, however, scary times. Have courage,
    Steve, and wish me the same.
    Best holiday wishes from my family to yours.

    Reply

  65. carol says:

    Happy Thanksgiving Steve to you and your partner, everyone is entitled to fall in love with whom they please and who are we to question that love?

    Reply

  66. SassySuzy says:

    Dear Steven and Washington Noters:
    My entire family sends their salutations and thanks for an
    incredible year with you. We have learned so much from your
    writing and sharing. We love your dogs and your humanity!
    We will think of you and your family, Steve, today at our dinner
    table and as we toast all that we are proud of and as we pray for
    those in need.

    Reply

  67. bangzoom14 says:

    Let’s all hope that January 20, 2009 will be the start of a new day, new light and new hope for this planet. I didn’t specifically mention the USA because we really have to start thinking of ourselves as just one of many countries in this world and stop tagging ourselves as the biggest, the best and the greatest as that is pure arrogance. And it’s this kind of arrogance that filters down to the right wing and allows them this right to stomp over anyone who doesn’t agree with them such as on the issue of gays and gay marriage. They can base their feelings on religious belief or whatever. It doesn’t matter. It’s pure arrogance and it’s gotta stop. A good place to start would be Obama’s inaugural address. Today I’m giving thanks as it’s only 54 more days.
    Steve: Happy Thanksgiving to you and your partner and a sincere thanks for all that you are doing.

    Reply

  68. PissedOffAmerican says:

    Sorry about the above double post from another thread. Captcha bit me once again. Here is what I meant to post…..
    Well, Steve, it could be worse. At least your wedding ceremonies weren’t vaporized by a CIA drone flown by some pimply faced kid sitting at a monitor in Nevada.
    Living here in Central Cal, I was suprised and shocked by the venal fervor the Prop 8 proponents exhibited. I can’t imagine why these people imagine themselves so threatened by homosexuality. This bigotry is strong, and widespread. I had no idea. If queried, I would have bet that Californians would not support Prop 8, and that it would have been defeated.
    Just last night, driving through the small rural burg I live in, I saw three “Yes on 8″ signs in front yards, even this late after the actual polling. I marveled at what could drive such determination, and why these people feel such an instinct to impose their bigotries on your ability to pursue happiness and social inclusion.
    By God, we’ll stand idly by as our leaders murder over a million people, and engage in medieval acts of horror against fellow human beings, yet we won’t allow gay marraige?
    Egads.
    On a lighter and more optimistic note, happy Thanksgiving everyone.
    These might not be fun times, but by God, they are truly interesting times. And something tells me they are going to get more and more fascinating as each day passes by. Have we really traveled centuries just to get to this sad and pitiful state? Stay tuned.

    Reply

  69. PissedOffAmerican says:

    As we are bombarded with press speculation and the vicariously tittilating live natterings of our foreign correspondents, its easy to forget such carnage goes on daily in Iraq and Afghanistan. 16 dead American servicemen this month, and who knows how many innocent casualties in the Iraqi population? Daily bombings, kidnappings, sectarian violence, and unspeakable hardships due to a destroyed infrastructure.
    Try to wrap your brain around the concept of one and a quarter million corpses. And thats just in Iraq. How many in Afghanistan?
    Can we really invade a sovereign nation, raze its infrastructure, pollute its environment, murder over a million of its citizens, without expecting to INCREASE the animous, hatred, and violence directed against us and our allies?
    Welcome to Bushworld, where the events such are unfolding in India will become a daily reality, and are nurtured and cultivated by our own policies.
    What is the death toll of Palestinians now? How many will go hungry today, or wanting for medical care? Can we really expect to subsidize, condone and abet Israel’s eradication policies and seriously expect to prevail in this shameless con-job known as the GWOT???
    If our media is going to show us terrorism, why don’t they show us ALL the terrorism, even that THAT WE INFLICT. There is a reason that journalists are being denied entry into Gaza, or are constrained by being “imbedded” with US troops in Iraq.
    Its an unpopular notion, but truth be told, the radical Islamists have a ways to go before they can even the score and match the sheer carnage that George Bush and Dick Cheney have inflicted on the Muslim community. And even if we were to leave Iraq tomorrow, the science would tend to support the premise that the presence of deadly DU dust will continue killing generations of Iraqis.
    George Bush and Dick Cheney will retire wealthy and unaccountable for their crimes. But we will pay the price for their evil, and our unwillingness to hold them to account for their crimes. The cat is out of the bag, our leaders are no longer constrained by the law, and they know it. We have shown them we will quietly and obediently stand mute as they commit unspeakably horrendous crimes against humanity. No wonder we face a future of 9/11′s and Mumbai’s. Its a hell of our own making.

    Reply

  70. Sandra Underwood says:

    Happy Thanksgiving and many blessings for you and your partner,
    your fine doggies, and your whole family, Steve!

    Reply

  71. rich says:

    Needs its own post!
    *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*
    So, today, I’ll be giving thanks for Steve Clemons, and his partner.
    *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*
    . ..
    I tend to think marriage is a matter of the heart, that no one can take that away. But I’m told there’s more to it, and wish you the public, formal realization of liberty’s blessing in the near future.
    Another observation—since:
    ” . . all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights . .”
    It is therefore literally impossible to suspend or deny those civil liberties. You could more easily suspend or outlaw the Second Law of Thermodynamics. They are intrinsic to our being.
    So, despite Arlen Specter’s presumption, sooner or later, our time is gonna come. And it’ll get here sooner than we think.

    Reply

  72. serge says:

    Steve…screw the bigots. You have your life, you’re lucky to have a devoted partner, you have some of the best looking dogs on the planet, you have a second home in the paradise of coastal Maryland (I’m a homey, thus partial), you have a fantastic job, you’ve proven to me that you’re a thoughtful and persuasive player in the increasingly more shark-infested waters of foreign policy. Barring any more Mormon interference, I’d say you’re on top of the world.
    And FWIW, I believe the blow-back from Prop 8 is going to hit the LDS “church” hard. Let’s talk “tax-exempt status.” You have a great holiday.

    Reply

  73. rich says:

    Congratulations, Steve.
    I won’t offer empty mollifying words about the general progressive tide of history. I’ll never understand how that eagerness to deny others access to the full benefits of liberty or the full embrace of Christianity, an intolerance so inconsistent with either belief system, ever had traction in this country. It’s your life–and I mean that in the best possible way!
    I did have a question, though.
    Does your dissatisfaction with Obama’s refusal to condemn the use of his voice in Prop 8 ads make you an angry movement progressive, too caught up in enforcing ideological conformity to responsibly see the need to come together as a nation? I don’t think so either–and hope you can extend the same for folks speaking out on other issues. In the name of reconciliation, it’s not too late for Obama to appoint Bill Frist or Pat Robertson as Sec of DHHS.
    I’m not being flip. And it’s not a moot or off-topic point.
    The need for accountability has been routinely dismissed, though the need for basic justice under the law has never been greater. Like Prop 8, the core violations listed in Scott Horton’s excellent “Justice Under Bush” (Dec 2008 Harpers), in which he zeros in on torture, have eviscerated the very heart and soul of America as an admirable or enlightened nation.
    The demand that there be some acknowledgement, and along with a definitive course correction, substantive accountability, is hardly naive or self-indulgent. It is entirely reasonable, fundamentally pragmatic, and more than justified. It is also our obligation as Americans.
    Some wonder at the passion and insistence directed at Washington establishment figures, and term it ‘angry’ or uncivil, though it is hardly that. Or wonder why some posters have slammed Jim Lehrer & the Newshour as a less than forthright enabler of Bush, Cheney, of the fraudulent case for war, and of a neocon agenda that attempted to undo the 240-year-old American project. Why?
    Scott Horton “was twice warned by PBS producers, in advance of appearances on The Newshour with Jim Lehrer, that [he] could use the word “torture” in the abstract but that [he] was instructed to refrain from applying it to the administrations’ policies.” Jim Lehrer isn’t a journalist, and his function isn’t to communicate the truth to the American people.
    Is it any wonder Americans are monitoring Barack Obama, the Dems–and The Newshour–for follow-through?
    On CNN, Horton’s mention of “the administrations’ torture policy” prompted a CNN producer to warn “That’s okay for CNN International, but we can’t use it on the domestic feed.” Getit? We can’t correct what we dont’ know about. But everybody already knows.
    Given the impetus of our nation’s founding, that torture is anathema to everything we are and everything we stand for, surely extrajudicial, cruel and unusual punishment rises to the level of high crime and misdemeanor.
    We could continue wreaking havoc abroad as though our current policies could be stomached at home or have no consequences for our national security. But NO one’s gonna pick us up off the floor after our little house of cards collapses.
    Even that heero, Jack Goldsmith, disingenuously asserts our torturers must have immunity—or they’ll feel too constrained to protect the country next time. Won’t protect the country? Yeah, right. More to the point, torture did not protect the country—and time-honored, Constitutionally-consistent interrogation methods do. Yet on top of their violations, Goldsmith thinks he’s in a position to hold us hostage, to extort the United States of America–and on a patently specious argument.
    @ –> http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2008/11/holding-country-hostage-by-digby-jack.html
    In WWII, German POWs were put to work on Midwestern farms–no guards, no fences, no torture–and throughout the 1980s and 90s, busloads of elderly German veterans would tour Nebraska, Iowa and Minnesota with tears in their eyes, still grateful for their unexpectedly humane treatment, still attached to the landscape and land they’d come to love.
    I’m all for civility and reconciliation—but that doesn’t mean giving up the store to those who’ve raided the shelves and overturned the rule of law.
    *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*
    So, today, I’ll be giving thanks for Steve Clemons, and his partner.
    I tend to think marriage is a matter of the heart, that no one can take that away. But I’m told there’s more to it, and wish you the public, formal realization of liberty’s in the near future. It’ll get here sooner than we think.
    *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*

    Reply

  74. mikolo says:

    Dear Mr. Clemons, I read your column regularly and although I don’t always agree with your positions, I feel very strongly about the proposition 8 disaster. You have my unqualified, absolute support on this issue.
    Continued happiness to you and yours,
    Mikolo

    Reply

  75. Bartolo says:

    Happy Thanksgiving and best wishes for 17 more years!

    Reply

  76. TB says:

    “In the Declaration of Independence it is written: ‘All men are created equal and they are endowed with certain inalienable rights.’
    “For…all the bigots out there: That’s what America is. No matter how hard you try, you cannot erase those words from the Declaration of Independence.
    “That’s what America is. Love it or leave it.”
    Harvey Milk
    Congratulations and happy Thanksgiving to you and yours Mr. Clemmons!

    Reply

  77. ... says:

    happy thanksgiving to all the americans here.. us canucks had ours over a month ago! – steve – congrats on your wedding anniversary – keep the ring on! i am in agreement with you in your concern for tolerance.. some things take time and others appear to move backwards (proposition 8).. old institutions and ways don’t die easy… happy thanksgiving and thanks for the posts.

    Reply

  78. LGBT Human Rights says:

    Sorry, didn’t realize we couldn’t use html.
    Anyway find Harvey’s hope message here:
    http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=MbWDNM0wuAc

    Reply

  79. Sue says:

    This is one post that I find myself 100% in agreement…. the bigotry and hatred have got to end.
    Congratulations on your marriage! Many happy decades to you!

    Reply

  80. LGBT Human Rights says:

    Harvey on hope

    Reply

  81. Bill Scheinman says:

    Interestingly enough, the other night I watched again a wonderful film about the horrors of intolerance and the triumph of love, To Kill a Mockingbird. It’s a reminder of how much has changed in America, and how much still needs to change. Ultimately, I believe love will win in the end. Even my 80-year old mother, who is often conservative on many issues, believes in gay marriage. I also know that she would have been against it a decade ago. It will happen. The walls of intolerance, though still standing, are crumbling. The fight must go on.

    Reply

  82. wrensis says:

    We have miles ahead in the struggle for equal rights. Having a black man in a house built by slaves is a great progress, but it is not the solution to the continuing rascism, sexism, ageism, gender bias and the right to to marry without bias. President Elect Obama must make sure he does not pull the ladder up behind him.
    Many blessings to both of you.

    Reply

  83. Helena Cobban says:

    Steve, thanks for some very moving and thoughtful writing.
    I feel huge pain for the ugliness that you and my other gay friends experience as part of their daily lot in this society. But I am so glad that did tie the knot, and wish you and your spouse many addditional happy years together.
    On the policy stuff, I share your sense of uncertainty. Willem Buiter has a good post today titled ‘Too many cooks in Obama’s economics kitchen.’ I’ve also been doing some Thanksgiving-related pondering on the question of what, actually, is the POINT of the economy, and what utility does the financial sector have within in.
    Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving.

    Reply

  84. tony says:

    wonderful post steve.
    congratulations on your marriage, congratulations on 17 years with
    your partner, and a happy thanksgiving to you and yours.

    Reply

  85. Carrie Boberry says:

    Happy Thanksgiving.
    I’ve been living in Ireland the past three years and reading your block for quite some time. Never commented — at least don’t remember commenting.
    My partner and I will most likely have the ability to legally marry in Ireland (at least a civil union) within the next year. No political party activly opposes at least some form of gay civil partnership. Here, in Holy Catholic Ireland.
    Makes me sad for the US.

    Reply

  86. Bil says:

    Yep, Happy Thanksgiving EVERYONE.

    Reply

  87. phil from new york says:

    Well said, Steve. And congratulations!

    Reply

  88. Pacos_gal says:

    oops, that comment should have ended with “Have a safe holiday”

    Reply

  89. Pacos_gal says:

    Happy Thanksgiving to both you and your spouse, and families.
    There is still much to be thankful for as the holiday season begins this year. Health, happiness, love in our lives, these are all of the best things.
    A chance for a new path for our country. Yes, I agree it can go either way.
    I have heard that “Milk” is an excellent film and that Penn did a really, really good job in the portrayal. I haven’t seen it yet, but I will, do feel free to tell us what you thought of it. Harvey Milk, tried to make the world a better place for others.
    Again, Happy Thanksgiving to everyone here at TWN and within the comments section. Have

    Reply

  90. WigWag says:

    Steve, happy Thanksgiving to you, your partner and your entire family!
    I am thankful for many things this year. One of those things is the hospitality with which you welcome us to your thought-provoking site. As far as I am concerned it is one of the most interesting locations on the internet.
    Let’s hope that the bigotry and ignorance that brought us incidents like the Mumbai tragedy and the passage of proposition 8 soon fade into the oblivion that they so richly deserve.

    Reply

  91. Lurker says:

    Steve,
    Your post just made my wife cry. The good kind of tears. Thanks for being part of our daily lives and poking all the right holes in bad dykes.

    Reply

  92. Lane Hudson says:

    Steve:
    I saw MILK yesterday. It is tragic, informative, inspirational, emotional, humorous, and honors the life and work of Harvey Milk in a profound way. There are many things we can all take from the film, regardless of our sexual orientation. I hope you’ll share your thoughts on the film soon.
    Fondly,
    Lane

    Reply

  93. DonS says:

    Steve, I’ve appreciated your humanity on this blog and our few personal email exchanges. We’re all imperfect, but you set a good standard for consistency on respecting all human rights.
    Thanks for stating what needed to be said here. For all of us.
    Pandering to prejudice is apparently often a stronger force than the blind eye/cognitive dissonance it takes to claim oneself unprejudiced but not act and speak out plainly against all forms of prejudice. Yeah, we hope Obama can grow.

    Reply

  94. bubba says:

    Hang in there Steve. I don’t think that 40 years ago most people thought we would see a black president by 2008 or in their lifetimes or their childrens’ lifetimes. Yes, this is way too long a time to wait, but change did happen and people came around. And this change will occur regarding gays, and at a much faster pace. Keep the faith, and give thanks that there are a lot of others out there who help fight intolerance no matter where it is directed. And this number grows each and every day.
    Happy Thanksgiving.

    Reply

  95. questions says:

    In the words of Mozi (c. 400 BCE):
    Duke Wen of Jin liked coarse clothing, and so during his reign the men of the state of Jin wore robes of coarse cloth, wraps of sheepskin, hats of plain silk, and big rough shoes, whether they were appearing before the duke in the inner chamber or walking about in the outer halls of the court. Now bringing oneself to wear coarse clothing is a difficult thing to do, and yet people did it because it pleased Duke Wen. So within the space of a single generation the ways of the people can be changed, for they will strive to ingratiate themselves with their superiors. (Burton Watson, trans.)
    There is hope for a changing culture somewhere between leadership and the desire to please. Hollywood, tv shows, out athletes and neighbors, all play a role in this process. It’s taking too long, if you ask me, but it is changing. My father’s parents were convinced homosexuality was weird, my daughter and I think Prop 8 is weird (and worse). Not so shabby for a few generations.
    Pumpkin pie in the oven — some traditions are good to breathe in!
    Happy holidays of all sorts to all people. (And does this sentiment mean I’m a warrior in the “war on Christmas?!)

    Reply

  96. Erin says:

    Congratulations, Steve, on your marriage, and I hope you and yours have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
    Also, thank you for your words, and for bringing light to this issue. My partner (of 14 years!) and I got married on those same steps just 11 days earlier, and it was quite a moment in my life.
    Like you said, stripping away the rights won’t take away the commitment we made. But we still have to fight!!

    Reply

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