I think both the church and Republican party could avoid a lot of these problems if they would just, at the very least, allow their clergy and representatives to masturbate.

Give these people some hand lotion, please. Our national security depends on it.

And maybe the Catholic Church should get real about their whole attitude towards sexuality in general and celibacy in particular.

Celibacy has no theolgocial basis but rather was a way for the Catholic Church to acquire property. If a priest or nun had no children, then any property they inherited from their own parents would go to the church. Small detail, this meant that normal people would not be attracted to the priesthood, but rather ill-adjusted folks, not exactly qualified to counsel lay persons on questions involving sex. This meant that some priests and nuns engaged in secret liasons, too often with children. Divine justice that the Church is now having to part with major properties to settle child molestation cases. Doesn't do much for the kids, though.

And then there's the attitude about birth control. According to the Cathloic church, even married folks are not supposed to use aritifical birth control, only the rhythm system, meaning they should only copulate when they thought a pregnancy could be avoided. But this flies in the face of another church tenet, namely that married couples should only engage in intercourse for the purpose of procreating. So which is it then? It seems to me if one believes that God is omnipotent, and it is that important for a child to be conceived, he/she can figure out a way to overcome a little bit of latex.

Steve, please note, I didn't use any off-color terms.

And while we're on the subject of sex, rumors, politics, and denials, I have three questions about the recent Edwards rumors.

1. Which of Edwards' staffpersons recommended/hired this particular videographer?

2. What, if anything, did this particular staffperson and this particular videographer have to do with the Edwards hair-primping footage being leaked to the MSM?

3. Did this particular staffperson and this particular videographer ever work for the Kennedys?

Steve, ask Senators Gary Hart and Joe Biden about rumors, scandals and Kennedy staffpeople.

"I think both the church and Republican party could avoid a lot of these problems if they would just, at the very least, allow their clergy and representatives to masturbate."--Memekiller

"Steve, please note, I didn't use any off-color terms."--Kathleen

Wait... this sounds familiar. My mom's name is Kathleen -- Mom? Is that you?

It's natural, I swear!

The Vatican Monsignor's story is very plausible. It's not as if the Church has been caught up in a sex scandal lately.

It's like that guy said, while knitting socks in that classic picture Stalag 17 when he got a letter from his wife writing him that a new born baby was left outside the front door of his home....

I believe it...I believe it..

That's what faith is all about no???

Memekiller... I could be... I'm somebody's Mom.

"Memekiller... I could be... I'm somebody's Mom."--Kathleen

Um... if you are, I'm writing right now.

Typical. Why just be taking advantage of children when you can be a damned liar taking advantage of children?

A shame we can't swing a few of these people from a gallows next to Cheney and GWB. Are public hangings anymore barbaric than waterboarding or sodomizing prisoners? I say we give it a try. Lets start with L.A.'s Mahoney.

The scary part? I wrote two satirical blog posts today about this exact same subject. The Vatican and Larry Craig need to seriously get their jollies out.

http://www.humblenarrator.com/2007/10/15/sen-craig-enters-wrong-order-at-drive-thru-receives-wrong-food/
http://www.humblenarrator.com/2007/10/15/vatican-official-hired-over-sex-scandal/